Parenthood....it's a bi-polar experience.

I love this article from the Huffington Post! Everything it says and the charming way in which it says it. Wanted to post here so I could remember it.

The Best Parenting Advice I Never GotJD Roberto.Writer and TV Host, How To Get The Guy and Outback Jack


I got a lot of parenting advice before my first child came into the world. I think people feel obligated to bestow their wisdom on expecting parents and, overall, I guess that's a good thing. Still, the advice I got - though well meaning and thoughtful - was almost entirely useless once the actual odyssey of being a dad began. Phrases like "life changing" and "wonderful adventure" came up repeatedly, but no one bothered to tell me I should go see a movie. These days, going to a movie involves two weeks of planning and forty bucks worth of babysitter -- and that's before you pay fourteen bucks for a ticket and six bucks for some Twizzlers.

Sleep was high on the recommendation list. "Get as much sleep as you can!" is what they tell you, but that particular pearl of wisdom seems entirely backward to me. What you should really be doing is training yourself to function on less sleep or sleep that is frequently interrupted. I guess you could try to stockpile sleep but, trust me, when you're up all night with a sick four month old, knowing you got a solid nine hours back in June doesn't help.

A few times, kindly grandparents summed up their parenting philosophy with something along the lines of, "Just shower 'em with love!" It's a heartwarming sentiment but I have yet to figure out how an exhausted parent is supposed to apply such sage counsel when his two-year-old is howling, spread eagle in the grocery store because he won't buy a pair of Elmo shaped oven mitts.

The most common phrase I heard in the run up to parenthood was the seemingly benign, "It's a tough job but it's all worth it." This is both true and diabolically misleading at the same time. Something about "it's all worth it" suggests a proposition where some small majority of the time things will be blissful. "Yes," you're led to believe, "it's going to be tough forty-nine percent of the time, but don't worry because the other fifty-one percent it is great." Guess what, it's not. The ratio is frequently twenty percent enjoyable to eighty percent aggravating. Some days clock in at fifty-four percent bearable with thirty-five percent maddening rounded out by a dash of bewildering. I've been through entire weeks of eighty-seven percent exasperating, and experienced good-night cuddles that are one hundred percent ecstasy. It's not balanced, it's bipolar. It's worth it not because it's easy as often as it's difficult, but because the perfect moments are so overwhelmingly sublime, you somehow forget the maniacal pajama tantrum you endured the night before.

If I could go back and give myself some more practical advice it would look something like this:

1. When they nap, you nap. Don't send emails, don't catch up on work. Nap.

2. Travel with your children when they are very young. At six months old it's just as easy to keep them entertained in Cozumel as it is in Cleveland. You might as well get a tan out of the deal.

3. Buy a rechargeable, cordless hand vacuum. Your floors and cars will thank you.

4. It's perfectly acceptable to make an entire dinner in the microwave.

5. In every parent-child relationship someone has to be the grown up. Try to make sure that someone is you. A two-year-old has the right to act like a child, you do not.

6. Take everyone who volunteers to babysit up on the offer. Repeatedly.

7. Buy everything you can second-hand.

8. Make time for the other relationships in your life -- seeing you in the role of good friend or devoted spouse teaches your kids way more than a Baby Einstein marathon.

9. There's no such thing as using too many wipes.

10. There will be times when you're sure you are a terrible parent and, secretly, wonder why you ever had kids in the first place. This is normal. Forgive yourself these occasional moments of self-doubt and, from time to time, let yourself mourn your life pre-parenthood. Then have a healthy glass of wine, get some sleep and get back to work. After all, as you've no doubt heard, it's a tough job, but it's all worth it.

Oh, and go see a movie while you still can.

Pre School Bound

Emma was So very excited to start school. She couldn't wait. Matthew is the extreme opposite. He does not want to start school at all. All he wants to do is spend all day with Emma. He has loved having her home for the summer. Matthew is so attached to his sister that sometimes I worry it is not normal. When they go to the playground, Emma is busy making new friends and Matthew is busy trying to find where Emma has run off to. He rarely likes making new friends and definitely doesn't like Emma playing with others.

He can't sit still too long to watch a fun movie and hates taking turns with most games. He prefers playing with his blocks or train tracks on his own but his favorite thing to do is to pretend to be a chef. He "cooks" for us all day long. His favorite recipe is Chocolate Blueberry Soup. He does not like to color, cut or paste. He just prefers to Doodle in his notepad. He doesn't draw much just make circles and lines.

With all that said, I've been nervous about him starting school in August. I can't see him doing crafts at school or trying to make friends. I can't see him trying new things (he isn't big on change) or taking turns with his classmates. But as the summer has gone by he has surprised me. I took them to a craft class at a local toy store and he did a fantastic job listening to the teacher and following directions. He even made a friend in the class. Also, in his Sunday school class he has been cutting and pasting more regularly with his fantastic teacher. The most recent sign that he is growing up is when I took him to a birthday party for Emma's friend. They said I could bring him along but I was nervous of how he would behave. It was a gymnastics party and he would have to share his Emma with the birthday girl. But once again he did a fantastic job playing with everyone and even tried the Zip Line they had set up.

I have to not worry so much about my little boy but it's so hard for me to do. Emma has been Miss Independant since birth, but Matthew with his early struggles is more clingy and needs some toughening up. Ben has been doing a great job of this at home. Now I need to learn to worry less about the little things. I am trying to be more confident about him going to school especially since it is only a couple weeks away!

Big Summer for Little Emma

It has been a big summer of accomplishments for Emma. It started the last few weeks of school when we went to her last skate night for the year. As I've written in past posts, she loves going to Skate Night at Hot Wheels and received her own personal pink skates for Christmas. She would get better everytime she went. She started only on the carpet and slowly went to the slippery rink where she would hold my hand. Well this last time she decided to let go and she did pretty well going all around all by herself! But even more to my surprise she decided to do the Kindergarten race that they do at the end of the night. We had talked about her maybe doing that next year but she said she was ready. She started off slow but was doing great when around the second turn she fell. She got embarrased and skated off to the side but I was so VERY proud of her for her brave attempt!


The other BIG thing for the summer is that she can now swim without her floaties!! She has been working hard with her Daddy and had great success this year. This is huge considering not long ago she would not even get her face wet in the water. She can also jump off the diving board (with her floaties) and jump in the shallow end without anyone catching her (no floaties). She is quite the little water bug.

Another thing that happened this summer was that we took Emma fishing for the first time. She begged for a fishing pole for her birthday and bought one with her birthday money. We went to our friends lake house and she was so excited to try her fishing pole. Not long after she began she caught a pretty decent sized Brim. Some friends went fishing later on and said they could not catch a thing! She also has been working hard in her Summer Bridge Book and has improved in her reading and math and even in her ability to work with money.

So proud of my girl and can't wait to see what else she will learn this year!

The Big 10

1997

Ben and I dated for 6 years before we got married. We spent most of my highschool and all of my college years together. Then we were married in June 2001. I have been married to my best friend for 10 wonderful years. I am the luckiest woman I know! He is handsome, kind, patient and so very loving. What more could I ask for?

We aren't the type to celebrate big dates in a big way. His birthdays, Valentines Days and Anniversaries usually consist of flowers and cards and maybe a favorite meal cooked at home. But this year I thought we MUST do something special!!

The evening could not have been better! I wanted to go to Atlantic Station since I've only been there a couple times during the day to run my Susan G Komen 5Ks. Ben had never been there. We started the night off watching Transformers-3(Darkside of the Moon) in IMAX 3D then had a nice dinner at Fishook Grille. We like to eat seafood when the kids aren't around since Emma is not a big fan. We walked around for a little bit. I really enjoyed the atmosphere at Atlantic Station. There seems like so much to do and see there - pretty cool! We then went down to midtown to Loca Luna. I had wanted to go see the Latin Band they had playing there but there were gone by the time we got there. There was a great DJ there that played current music and popular Latin music so we still had fun dancing!! We then met up with my brother and sister-in-law downtown to meet some other friends. It was an all round perfect night, with perfect weather and perfect company.

Atlantic Station

Happy Anniversary to me and my love!!!

Matthew-isms

Emma and Matthew say a bunch of things that make me smile. Emma has always impressed me with strong questions and keen observations. But Matthew has his little sayings that he says that I will carry in my heart forever.

First of all he calls his sister "MY Emma". "Where is MY Emma" , "Have you seen MY Emma", Even when they are fighting it is "MY EMMA pushed me"

He also notices when we chuckle at him (or even at other things) and with his somewhat comical angry face states "It's not fun-ny". Which makes everyone laugh more of course.

One of my favorites sayings came when the entire family was debating how much we love eachother. I love you inifinity stated Emma. Well I love you infinity squared I battled back. Then Matthew thinking hard concluded with, "I love you inifinity CIRCLE".

This past weekend Matthew drank his drink super fast and was proud of himself. He looked up at me and said. "Mommy, did I drink that pretty good.......or handsome good?"

I wish I could remember some of Emma's sayings right now but there are probably too many to recall. With Emma it is not always what she says, but HOW she says it. She talks with her hands and makes the most animated facial expressions!! I don't think she can tell a story without moving her body/face.

Love these kids to pieces!

Birthday Pics 2011

I usually get the kid's pictures done around their birthdays. This year right before Matthew's birthday he busted his chin open at Home Depot after falling over a pallatte that was left in the ailse. So I had to wait a little longer for that to heal up before taking their pictures. They came out pretty good as usual but what do you expect when you have gorgeous kids like mine!!

SUMMER is here!

Summer has officially begun and that means POOL time. We think Emma might learn to swim this summer without her floaties and at the rate Matthew is going, he might learn too. They love Mami Yoli's pool and swimming with their cousins!